The Most Important Thing I’ve Learned About Friendship

Sometimes words need to be shaken up. How we see and view words need to be changed. And I can't think of anyone who should do it better for Writing for Christ than the absolutely lovely Rachelle Rea. A beautiful woman inside and out, I'm thrilled to invite her back to my site, talking about friendship. Take a few minutes. You'll be encouraged as much as I was in reading her words. 

If you asked someone the most important thing they've learned about friendship, what do you think most people would say? Probably be one.

That wouldn't be my answer. My answer would roam less along the lines of be one and more along the road of be you and be bold. For that is the road along which I have found all of my favorite friends.

Don't Change, Dear Heart... Be You

I once had a friend who told me her mother thought I was a bad influence because I was too giggly and starry-eyed (read: immature). I once had another friend who stopped talking to me without telling me why. Both friendships ended with me hurt and wondering if being me, random and INFJ and writer that I am, guaranteed future friendships would not last.

I'm glad to report that is false information, friend. Not everyone may like you, but there are more people like you than you think.

Take, for example, this starry-eyed, giggly girl right here. After those two failed friendships, Jesus tugged women into my life who talk Story and Changing the World and Chocolate with me. 

Everyone should have a friend to talk Chocolate with.

Take heart. Someday--soon, maybe--someone will come walking alongside you and smile and whisper, "You, too, eh?" Watch out. It'll happen.

Defy the Fear, Brave One...Be Bold

The most important thing I've learned about friendship is that, not only are there people out there who like writing and Once Upon a Time and books like I do, but those people are seeking friendships, too.

Hear me, heart, for I tell you true: it's not as hard to ask someone to the coffee shop as you might think. And the answer will be yes more often than you might hope.

As women, we need girlfriends. And I'm not just talking about you. I'm talking about the girl who sits in front of your row at church, the woman you bump into at the grocery store, the lady in your section of the bookstore.

I wish I had statistics on this, but just from my own life I can tell you rarely will anyone say, "I have all the friends I need, thank you very much. Go away." 

Introvert Alert: more people would like to spend time with you and do life with you than you might suspect. So swallow the fear and ask someone to coffee, to church, to dinner, to a bookstore outing.

Strike up a conversation about Downtown Abbey or Doctor Who or whatever you've been reading lately. Share your passion for scarves. Compliment their earrings (we do love that, don't we, women?).

Why can't we be friends?

Rachelle Rea writes novels by night (her debut series releases next year!). By day, she coaches others in the craft as a freelance editor. A homeschool and college grad, her favorite moments most often include friends, dogs, or chocolate. Or all of the above.