Not Settling ~ Go for Lavish, Not Less ~ Guest Beth Vogt

Throughout the month of June, we have talked about "not settling", being content in where we are as young women, waiting for our Prince Charming. And until the day comes that we meet and fall in love, that we will not swerve from our standards anchored in the word of God. If you wish to read the other posts in this series, please click on my page "Committed to Purity" where they have been gathered. 

“Some day my prince will come …”

So sings Cinderella as she slaves for her evil stepmother and endures abuse from her stepsisters. Despite a dreary life à la Disney, Cinderella believes the “wish her heart makes” will come true.

What about you?

Beth and Rob on their wedding day

Are you dreaming of your happily ever after with a present-day prince of a guy? Or are you thinking about settling for something – someone – less than?

Waiting for Mr. Right is often woven into romance movies and novels. Think Sleeping Beauty. Or Enchanted. Or the recent CBA bestseller, The Wedding Dress by Rachel Hauck. But waiting is so wearying when it’s part of real life – of your life. And when everyone else is finding their guy, it’s tempting to settle for Mr. Almost Right.

Don’t do it.

I know, I know, it’s easy for married-me to tell single-you to wait. But hear me out.

Before I married my husband, I almost said “I do” to someone else. Other people thought he was my Mr. Right. Truth be told, these people thought he was an a-ma-zing guy: gregarious, athletic, intelligent. Of course, no one else was dating him. And no one knew the hours I spent crying over this relationship, wondering why it felt so forced.

But I had a flawless diamond ring on my finger. And a lot of family and friends watching. Despite being young, I was old enough to accept life wasn’t ever going to be perfect.

I could have settled – all the while convincing myself this relationship, this guy, would be enough.

In the end, I couldn’t do it.

Why?

Beth and Rob ~ 2011
(John Skiba photography)

I wasn’t a believer at the time, so I can’t tell you that God and I had a long talk (God talking and me listening). Here’s what did happen: I realized marriage should never be about less. When you’re committing “’til death do us part,” there should be anticipation for all the “more” waiting for you. And yes, this means the good and the bad. You’re going to do real life together.

I walked away from the engagement. Endured a lot of “Are you crazy?” reactions.

And within weeks I met my future husband, who also talked to me about his faith and helped me rediscover mine.

Does making the choice not to settle mean God ensures Mr. Right appears? Nope. But here is the one thing you can be certain about:

God is all about more.

God, who lavishes his grace on us (Romans 5:1-2 The Message), also says marriage is one way we reflect him to the world. His plans for your life – whether they include a Mr. Right or not – will always mean embracing his absolute best for you.

And God is not less than – he’s awe-some.

Casey here again: All this month I have had a giveaway of Never the Bride by Rene Gutteridge and Cheryl Mckay and hopefully it will encourage you on your journey. Leave a comment on how YOU are NOT settling below and I'll draw the names from all the posts and announce the winners (one from every Settling post) the first Friday of July.  

Also, Beth's novel, Wish You Were Here shares bits and pieces of Beth's story woven through the life of her character Allison. The winner from this post will have the chance to request Beth's book if they so choose.