Choices to be joyful.
Choices to be grateful.
Choices to surrender.
Except...He's not a thing. He's my Savior. My Rock. My Salvation. And too often I turn to something or someone else in times of struggle and strife to release my emotions to. And like the book pointed out last night, there is nothing inherently wrong with going to friends and family...God gave us those people for a reason. What becomes wrong is they become my default.
The book asked another question: who comes to mind first when you have a joy or a struggle you want/need to share? I paused. And the answer was incredibly convicting: not Jesus.
Of course in larger and bigger struggles than what I can handle within my two fists, He is the first one I run too, cry too, weep before. But the day-to-day struggles? The strife at the workplace or the frustration with my writing or even the accomplishment of a simple contest submission or a synopsis finished, who do I turn to first to share all this?
Jesus isn't my answer as much as I would have liked to say He is. God wants every part of my life. Not just the struggles. Not just the joys. Not just the "God, help me!" or "God, please provide a way" bellows from my soul's deepest caverns, He wants it all.
Do I want God in every part of my life? I don't even hesitate in saying: YES. But it starts with me. Too often I like to put the weight on God, that He'll show up when I need Him most and I'll keep muttering a prayer here or there throughout the day. But it's my choice to invite Him in. He's right there, waiting for me, it's my choice to open the door wider. God's not a door-barger or an envelope pusher (yes, I do recognize that I am mixing my metaphors).
Humans have the glorious decision of free will.
Human have the weight-filled decision or free will. With that free will we can let God in or push Him away.
I talk a lot about giving God our dreams. Aligning our plans perfectly with His even greater and deeper dreams for our lives. To truly mean what I say, I have to communicate more than just my heart's desires to God, I have to communicate everything within my heart to the Savior of my soul.
I have to ask (and mean it) every day for God to make me more like Him.
So which do you choose? Life as you know it? Or a deeper, stronger walk with God, one where everything is His...by your choice.