Friday, November 7, 2014

The Most Important Thing I’ve Learned About Friendship

Sometimes words need to be shaken up. How we see and view words need to be changed. And I can't think of anyone who should do it better for Writing for Christ than the absolutely lovely Rachelle Rea. A beautiful woman inside and out, I'm thrilled to invite her back to my site, talking about friendship. Take a few minutes. You'll be encouraged as much as I was in reading her words. 

If you asked someone the most important thing they've learned about friendship, what do you think most people would say? Probably be one.

That wouldn't be my answer. My answer would roam less along the lines of be one and more along the road of be you and be bold. For that is the road along which I have found all of my favorite friends.

Don't Change, Dear Heart... Be You

I once had a friend who told me her mother thought I was a bad influence because I was too giggly and starry-eyed (read: immature). I once had another friend who stopped talking to me without telling me why. Both friendships ended with me hurt and wondering if being me, random and INFJ and writer that I am, guaranteed future friendships would not last.

I'm glad to report that is false information, friend. Not everyone may like you, but there are more people like you than you think.

Take, for example, this starry-eyed, giggly girl right here. After those two failed friendships, Jesus tugged women into my life who talk Story and Changing the World and Chocolate with me. 
Everyone should have a friend to talk Chocolate with.

Take heart. Someday--soon, maybe--someone will come walking alongside you and smile and whisper, "You, too, eh?" Watch out. It'll happen.

Defy the Fear, Brave One...Be Bold

The most important thing I've learned about friendship is that, not only are there people out there who like writing and Once Upon a Time and books like I do, but those people are seeking friendships, too.
Hear me, heart, for I tell you true: it's not as hard to ask someone to the coffee shop as you might think. And the answer will be yes more often than you might hope.

As women, we need girlfriends. And I'm not just talking about you. I'm talking about the girl who sits in front of your row at church, the woman you bump into at the grocery store, the lady in your section of the bookstore.

I wish I had statistics on this, but just from my own life I can tell you rarely will anyone say, "I have all the friends I need, thank you very much. Go away." 

Introvert Alert: more people would like to spend time with you and do life with you than you might suspect. So swallow the fear and ask someone to coffee, to church, to dinner, to a bookstore outing.
Strike up a conversation about Downtown Abbey or Doctor Who or whatever you've been reading lately. Share your passion for scarves. Compliment their earrings (we do love that, don't we, women?).

Why can't we be friends?

Rachelle Rea writes novels by night (her debut series releases next year!). By day, she coaches others in the craft as a freelance editor. A homeschool and college grad, her favorite moments most often include friends, dogs, or chocolate. Or all of the above.


  1. This is wonderful, Rachelle. I have been immensely, crazily blessed with amazing friends. Some friendships have spanned, literally, since I was a toddler and others are new within the past year or two. Each one is unique and wonderful and rich. Working where I work (a homeless nonprofit), it's hit me over and over again what a blessing it is to have these kinds of relationships. Loneliness is heartbreaking and I see it every day in the men and women our ministry serves. And it prompts me to want to be a better friend to those I've already got...and to reach out to others in a way that challenges me.

    Wonderful post!

  2. I LOVE that, so encouraging. Thank you!

  3. This fits so much into what I've been thinking about lately. I've always been a bookish person, more into reading (and writing) than anyone around me.
    But over the last year, the Lord has given me a writing friend who is so *like* me, it's funny.
    I'm majorly introverted, but I think when you're around people who "get" you, it's easier to be comfortable.
    Thanks for sharing!

  4. Cheryl -- thank you!

    Melissa -- I didn't know you worked for a nonprofit! Me, too. It's amazing work, isn't it? Agreed--growing friendships requires challenging ourselves. Courage. I love how much Jesus has taught me recently in that area.

    MJ -- thanks!

    Courtney -- So glad! I'm the same, and He's done the same in my own life. I love hearing "Oh, you, too?" :)

  5. And the socks. "It's not the best-paying job, but it's best for cocktail party conversation," said Betsy Royall of Taylor Royall, Timberland Sale a Baltimore casting company that auditioned Thomas by talking to him about his baseball experiences as he tossed a ball around. "They get their five minutes of fame." Timberland Outlet online Long before it signed NFL quarterbacks Tom Brady and Cam Newton to endorsement deals, Under Armour commercials contained a muscular sort of local grit.


Thank you so much for stopping by, I love to hear from those who traffic my blog! Have a wonderful day. :)

FTC Rules

According to new FTC rules I must let you, the reader know, that all views shared on this blog are strictly my own. Books to review are either provided for me by the author, publisher or ones I have purchased and I am under no obligation whatsoever to present anything, but my true opinion on any product. I receive no monetary compensation for anything written on this blog. Any giveaways on this blog are provided by the author/ publisher and I am not responsible for any views they express in their work or on this site. Giveaways are void were prohibited and chances of winnng are based on the number of applicants. A random winner is draw when a book is given away.

Blog Design by Imagination Designs all images from the Country Wildflowers kit by Laurie Ann